If the devil had a ninja attack squad, it would be comprised of wasps. Their floppy legs, angular bodies, permanent cranky stank face, and invisible kamikaze kung fu attack tactics bring terror to my very soul. Which is why we all need DIY Natural Wasp Killer Spray.
When it comes to stinging insects, I’d rather fight a bear…at least with a bear, you can see your enemy.
Past history dictates that in emergency situations, given the choice of flight, fight, or freeze, regardless of the opponent, I fight. I’m part Scottish…we’re an honorable sort who don’t back down from a respectable scrap.
Fear of The Opponent
Except for when the opponent is a wasp, in which case I run screaming like a freakin’ skirt.
I am a girl, but prefer to think of myself as a boy with girl parts…not in a gender crisis sort of way, just in a tomboy who never leaves the house without mascara kind of way.
As I am not generally given to fear, I find it annoying that wasps and their crazy mad ninja skills render me a damsel in distress. When one has a fear, the best way to move past it, is to face it head on.
So after a particularly disgraceful, girly retreat a few weeks ago where I left Farmboy and our guy friend Jess to dauntlessly whack the wasps by our shed with a hat, I decided enough was enough and it was time to face my fears and fight those damn little devil ninjas.
But first, I needed a solid, well thought out plan. Or, strategy as we soon to be experienced military style wasp killers like to call it.
My First Thought
- Napalm. I have no idea what’s in napalm. I can’t imagine it’s anything good, and given my preference for the natural approach, that wouldn’t do.
My Second, Slightly More Thought-out Thought
- A match. But the idea of my house aflame was somewhat disconcerting.
Third Stroke of Brilliance (Almost)
- Run the loader tractor through the shed…but then we’d be out a shed & seeing as there is no cab on the tractor, I’d probably be swarmed and roll it down the driveway.
I clearly had no experience in this type of battle, so as any good General would do, I turned to the internet for answers.
The Research Into Natural Wasp Killer Spray
The first article I found was from the Illinois State Extension. (Read the article. It’s freaking hysterical!)
They recommended using dish soap for a natural wasp spray.
Yes. Dish soap.
My huge Scottish heid (that’s Scots for head) whirled with a myriad of emphatic statements & rhetorical questions like…
Ya mean to tell me these wretched, death mongering spawns of satan could be offed with something as benign as dish soap? Why have I never heard of this?
With a natural, homemade wasp spray this easy, why does that stinky, sticky, oily, chemical ridden Raid exist?
And, perhaps most importantly…
How many miles have I put on these very sexy Scottish legs of mine retreating in terror from something whose kryptonite is freakin soap?!
The Battle Against The Wasps
A heavy dose of Scots outrage exploded into being as I thought to myself, “You doona oon me anymair ye bawfaced bastards! Yer gaun doooon!”.
Testosterone fully pumping, I changed my skirt out for a kilt, painted my face blue, grabbed my Claymore that looked suspiciously like a garden hand pump sprayer, poured in some homemade, natural wasp death sauce, pumped it up to maximum pressure and dashed outside, Highland war cry at full volume, ready for battle.
Twenty feet later, wind blowing through my hair, chest heaving with adrenaline, I came to a halt & drew myself up to full height as I found myself face to face with my enemy.
The world around us silently disappeared as we locked eyes. The tiny terror’s face was stank, but no match for my snarling, nostril flaring, growling, righteously furious Scottish glare. He. Was. Goin’. Down.
He made the first to move by hopping one inch to the left.
And I fearlessly countered his attack…
by promptly chucking the sprayer at Jess and running away screaming in terror. Like a skirt.
Shame. So. Much. Shame.
Much to the dismay of the entirety of my ancestral line, I have yet to fight any of the wee ‘lil buggers.
As such, this post is an attempt at atonement, as I have so deeply disgraced my brave ancestors. Perhaps if I share my knowledge of this fancy new natural homemade wasp killer with the world, I may at least be able to lift my shameful head high enough to see past my fast moving feet….
In the spirit of redemption, here’s the recipe.
We buy this natural dish soap because it’s a heck of a deal (& we won’t have to buy soap for dish washing for a hundred years). We got our handsprayer at Ace, but if you have an amazon account, you can get an equally marvelous garden hand pump sprayer here.
Natural Wasp & Insect Spray Killer
An incredibly simple, natural, homemade wasp spray killer recipe. Find us on the web at www.frugalhippie.com
- 1 part Natural Dish Soap
- 3/4 part Water
Fill handsprayer 3/4 to fill line with water.
Add 1/4 dish soap to reach the fill line. Give the sprayer a good shake to mix ingredients.
Pump the hand sprayer.
Give it a test spray to be sure you're prepared for battle.
Spray wasps and other mean biting insects for 5-10 seconds.
Aim & shoot.
Stand your ground. Don't stop spraying until wasp or other mean insect is very thoroughly coated.
Watch to make sure they've moved on to the netherworld from whence they came.
As bugs breath through their outer “skin”, we have found it to be effective at killing most any bug. Larger bugs may take a bit more time to cover.
BE CAREFUL not to spray beneficial insects like honey bees, ladybugs, praying mantis, etc.
As common sense would dictate, exercise caution when fighting any insect that could harm you.
Why Natural Soap Insect Killer Works
According to Arizona State University’s Ask a Biologist page, insects, like those wily wasps, breathe through their skin. A coating of soap renders breathing an unavailable option, which, we all know makes things dead.
Which is how we like them.
Nae find yer bollocks and brave the battle o tha wee beasties! Tae freedom!
Me and my skirt will be over here cheering you on.
Peace & Love – Shannie
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